Feb. 11 -2009

Hey Hobbes!

So the book asks why am I here at CM school. Well simply put I have been growing in power in the last 5-10 years or so, but there are many elements and parts of me that I have yet to discover. I know that as far as the elemental realms I am weak in knowledge and power of earth. For that reasons stones and patience tend to elude me. My energy is very different than most others. I tend to coincide it with the dark energy and dark matter that propels the universe to entropy. I need to understand this dark energy and I want to be able to focus it into whatever tool I need it to be.

Some aspects of energy healing would be nice to learn, as I already have the ability to remove headaches from people, and it would be nice to heal those, or myself who have larger issues with their health.My primary spirit guide whispered to me once that I could be another Taliesin. I too feel that possibility because meditation and intuition often lead to insightful bursts of knowledge from the prajna (realm of universal wisdom).

What I expect ot get out of CM is an introduction into different ways of using energy, of rituals, and other aspects of the craft. I want the school to challenge me and prepare me for a benefactor who can point me toward the full realization of myself as a creator and participant in this universe.

Excerpt from personal diary (meditations upon the shadow world):My shadow self points out to me that my lack of patience with inanimate objects stems from my under-realistic opinion of my abilities, and my vision of the task done to perfection. When I encounter adversity with an object my failure to meet my expectations results in violent outburst of rage against an object that did not intend me harm. This is something I need to work on in order to truly find equanimity. So far things are not always going all that well, but there is the odd time where I can catch myself before going off.